My Manic State of Mind

Saturday, April 20, 2013

Current State of My Mind

Bloggers, can you really post so much blog in a day? Or is it just me? I feel like I am in a manic state right now as I feel I have the need to write or blog all these things that are in my mind. I can't really concentrate much with work because all these ideas seem to pop in my mind all the time. I need to put them put them into writing because otherwise, I won't get any sleep.

I wanted to write a book, but then when I started to think of the first sentence, I get writer's block. You can't really write a book with scattered ideas, can you? That's why I love blogging because I can write one topic and then another different one in a different post. If I have enough posts,then I might just think about making a compilation of my posts and turn it into an ebook. 

On the other hand, this is better than having a "ranting or nagging" spree. :)

Back to my previous post, The Ironies of Life, I actually wanted to write a separate post about that because, if you have read it, I talked about how I felt guilty of being "trigger-happy" in committing suicide in the past. Yes, you can call me crazy now. I am past that stage. If you call me crazy at that time, I may have poked your eye. I was such a war-freak.

I thought that it was at last the end of my love-affair with suicide. I was wrong, it was just the beginning. After that post in 2008, there was a series of episodes wherein I really wanted to die, up until 2009 where I thought I got my wish come true. I was rushed to the hospital for overdose on sleeping pills. Those were prescribed to me by the way, but I felt I needed more so I won't wake up anymore. Until 2012 where I was placed in a situation that I need to survive for the sake of my children who needed me.

I posted another about how ashamed I was of always wanting to die when other people were struggling and fighting to survive. I wrote about it in Farewell to May , my way of saying goodbye to a cousin who succumbed to leukemia. And that's when I realized how selfish I had been.

I was surprised to know that I was able to blog about nonsense in the past, much of like this particular one. Maybe again due to my manic state of mind. 

Here are some of the posts I wrote. Feel free to read through them and see if it teaches you a valuable lesson in life.:)

Facebook Me- yes, I did my own review of the movie. Hahaha! That was in 2010. Fast forward 2 years after, I actually know one person who was personally involved in the movie. Shh..he doesn't know I know, but he hired me as a researcher, so these things would eventually pop up in Google.

Bet Your Life- this is crazy! This is a post about how people  and how much money  people are betting on Manny Pacquiao.

Pacman's Fight: From a Woman's Point of View- eeek! What was I thinking ? Read for yourself!

Moody Me- this one's my favorite because I got responses from people who could relate to me at that time. 

I hope you enjoyed reading as much as I enjoyed writing. I talk too much, but I write more.

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